yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
