I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
