return my video game
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
