wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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