he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
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Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
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I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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