My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize