They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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