these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm like, not good at living.
Congratulations! We have a period
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