a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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