Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
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We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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