Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
