Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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