had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
