Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
