laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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