I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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