I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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