I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
