I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Shame - the story of my life.
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