i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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