that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
