guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
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