I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
