Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
