did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Randomize
