Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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