remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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