porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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