Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
