every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
