I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
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I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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