It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
