alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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