ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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