Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Randomize
