i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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