Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
