I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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