So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
