Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
PANTIES FOUND
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
