The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
