Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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