PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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