I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
