yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize