Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
