Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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