Someone shit on the floor
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
