so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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