Are we in a gay sports bar?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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